|Men, it's time for your wake-up call!|
| For those single men who steadfastly strive to enhance theirchances at an exciting andsuccessful social life, you may stop reading now. I wish you the best. Smile and be proud of yourefforts. This column is not directed at you. I am writing today toinform the single men (youknow who you are) who repeatedly sit at home complaining and whiningabout the status of theirsocial lives claiming that there are "no quality women out there thatinterest me or who are worthmy time."|
Let me shed some light for you. You could not be more mistakenor misguided. How do Iknow? I plan regular events for singles. I talk with those whoattend. There are literallythousands of attractive, intelligent, sincere, ambitious, talented,successful and spirit-filledwomen who are looking to pursue relationships with quality men. Theproblem is that they arewondering where all the men have gone. Experience has led women tobelieve that single men areeither all spoken for, in permanent hibernation or simply don't exist. Why do they believe thisto be so? Because when women attend a typical singles gathering, theytalk and interact primarilywith other women because they are the only ones present.
Men, write this down and embrace it as fact. The two topopportunities for men to meet andinteract with women in casual and stress-reduced environments are"active" singles organizationsand church-related single's ministries. Singles organizationsnationwide are experiencing adisheartening shortage of men. The question is why? Many men correlateinvolvement in thesegroups with personal failure, weakness or desperation. One manindicated to me that "only loserswho have totally given up and lost their pride attend single's events." When I asked him when helast went on a date his reply was "I can't recall." Go figure.
What men like this fail to realize is that from a woman'sperspective, it is just theopposite. Women consider it a sign of strength, self-confidence, andambition when a man iswilling to take an active role in the success of his social life. Aconfident man who is willingto display a nurturing spirit, yet powerful presence will find himselfvery attractive to women.
Church-related groups provide numerous opportunities for singlesto interact with otherswho hold core beliefs similar to theirs. Whether through classes,ensembles, planned events, trips or volunteer endeavors, occasions are provided inwhich neither party needprepare for or plan the interaction.
As I see it, single men have two choices. Continue to whine,make excuses and experienceloneliness or put themselves in a position to meet someone special. Either way, the choice istheirs. But remember, what people practice, they become good at.